He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Bring me that man meat
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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