In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
