people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
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