THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
