idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
