dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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