Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Randomize