Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Randomize
