i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
