even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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