Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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