Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
