You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
