I think I died a long time ago.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
