; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Randomize
