I want to walk on stilts...naked
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
