Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
