look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
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