Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize