He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
