Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
