Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize
