watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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