I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
my mouth tastes like poor choices
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Randomize
