somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Me too!
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
