before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
I think my vagina is haunted
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
True strength comes from lack of pants
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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