my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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