she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
nutella sex= disaster
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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