guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
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