Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
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