im about as happy as oj after his trial
I looked at my own cervix.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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