Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
they're like a gay fantastic four
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
