Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Randomize