I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
time to smoke my breakfast
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize