Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
