Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
