I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
