: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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