WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize