i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
