i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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