? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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