i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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