grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize