Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
My breasts were aching with rage.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
