I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize