i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
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