Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
