So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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