I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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