I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
